a child, I loved teeter totters. However, I didn't find the teeter totter
of life direction as much fun until I recognized it as just thata
teeter totter. So when things become blurred, if I'm not too far down, several
things occur to me:
- Knowing I'm on the
down side of the teeter totter somehow helps me through the maze of confusion.
At this point that I try not to think too much about it. I don't always
know what to do or where I am going, but I am now quite comfortable with
that uncertainty. I have utter confidence that I am doing the right thing
even if I'm only staring off into space, riding along Pacific Coast Highway,
or wondering what to do next.
- Focusing on lack
of direction drains my energy and lowers my self esteem and I need all the
energy and confidence I can muster for the transition process. So, I stay
busy making contacts, collecting information, and meditating because I know
that I will eventually be informed.
- Realizing that life
self organizes, I keep unfolding my love affair with it doing all I know
to do and waiting for the surprises (some wonderful and some not) that arise
as a result.
- When I can't seem
to get it together, I don't force it. I just let time pass and see what
happens next and do whatever occurs to me. That may be making a list of
my uncertainties, reviewing my Intentions List or talking with someone who
can give me another perspective on things.
- I can relax because
I know that Life self organizes, that I can trust it. Further, I know that
Life goes right and left. The right turns make me feel good and the left
turns teach me. Along with trusting Life, I know that it works--not always
the way I want it to--but it works.
- Thought seems to
be hazardous to my life direction if I use it to judge the outcome rather
than support my creativity and activity. Thought, used as a judge, is a
curse; used as a motivator, becomes a gift. If I can't get a cue, I don't
judge that, I just take another step and wait for more information to come
in. Sometimes the information comes quickly, and sometimes it takes months.
Whatever the time frame, I try not to judge that either.
- When my life direction
doesn't seem to make sense, I give it time and space. Because I know
that know that in the right timing, I always know what to do. I don't
have to ask, "What do I do now?" In that sense, it resembles love. You
don't need to ask someone, "Am I in love now?" You know. The same thing
works in life direction.
- Leap-frogging over
the uncertainty and waiting period and going to certainty and choice
usually doesn't work. So, I don't use energy trying to do that. The
uncertainty period helps me see life direction as a teeter totter; sometimes
it's up and sometimes down, and sometimes it balances. And whenever
I take action it moves.
- Learning how to value
thought fluctuations that cause blurring of the focus takes work. But
I've learned that the blurring signals the arrival of something new.
As a result, I don't try to immediately unravel it. I honor and value
its process, even though at times it feels like "the valley and the
shadow of death," as spoken about in the 23rd Psalm.
- It seems so simple
but I need to remind myself frequently that my life direction is in
me and when the time is right, it makes itself known. And when I need
to talk with someone about it, I know that too. This means taking action
and learning from it, not sitting around hoping my life direction will
appear out of nowhere. It's mostly true, "The harder/smarter you work
the luckier you get."
- After many years of
valuing unsolicited Lifecareer advice, I now find it's costly-both in
time and energy-and usually isn't too useful, simply because it doesn't
resonate with my experience and doesn't dovetail with my own personal
knowledge, but like junk mail, occasionally, I find a pearl. Robyn Davidson
(1980) in her book Tracks describes her solo trek with camels across
1,700 miles of Australian outback. On return she began sorting out all
her experience and two important learnings emerged. They were:
- "...that you are as
powerful and strong as you allow yourself to be...that the most difficult
part of any endeavor is taking the first step, making the first decision.
'Camel trips, as I suspected all along, and as I was about to have confirmed,
do not begin or end, they merely change form.'"
- I now understand that
life direction continually moves in and out of focus, and like camel
trips, it doesn't end, it just continues to change form. However, using
my Career Compass®-my experience, intelligence, and intuition-I
always get a reading for my next step and that leads to another, and
another, and another.